Polish news weekly gives run-down of what Hollywood thinks of Bush

My Warsaw friend, Agnieszka, sent me a link to a Polish news weekly which, in addition to having interesting news of Poland, has a detailed story on what they’re saying about Bush in Hollywood and in the music industry. Now, granted, we may well guess what these guys are saying about him. But the quotes are news to me and so I thought I’d pass them on, straight from this week’s issue of Wprost (title of the article: “the coalition of the hating”):

[the article starts off with a bit of humor:
back in the old days of communist rule, Andropov spoke with Reagan. “In our country,” says Reagan, “we have free speech.” “In our country, we, too, have free speech” retorts Andropov. To which Reagan responds “Everyone in our country can criticize the president of the USA!” Andropov is triumphant. “So what, you think it’s different here? We, too, can criticize the president of the USA!”]

Jessica Lange: “nienawidze go” [“I hate him”]
Barbara Streisand: "Obawiam się przywódców, którzy biją w wojenne bębny, aby doprowadzić obywateli do patriotycznej gorączki" [“I’m terrified of leaders who beat war drums –NC:did I lose something in the translation here??—in order to lead citizens to feverish patriotism”; NC: this is like playing telephone, by the time it comes around again, Barbara will have said that she’s scared because Bush is insisting we play drums to show patriotism]
Woody Harrelson: "Jestem Amerykaninem, którego męczą amerykańskie kłamstwa. To jest rasistowska i imperialistyczna wojna" [“I’m an American—NC:temporarily fluent in Polish, but hey..—who is tortured by American lies. This is a racist and imperialist war.” ]
Raper Moby [the rapper, unfortunately comes out as “raper” when translated into Polish] "Ameryka, w którą wierzymy, nie przeżyje kolejnych czterech lat rządów George'a Busha" [“America, in which we believe, will not survive four more years of George Bush’s rule”]
Don Henley, lider [lead singer] The Eagles: "Muzycy są zobowiązani do zaangażowania się przeciw Bushowi. Jesteśmy przecież obywatelami tego kraju". [“Musicians have a responsibility to be engaged against Bush. We are, after all, citizens of this country.”]
Bruce Springsteen: "Krzyczcie głośniej, jeżeli pragniecie zmiany prezydenta" [during his NY concert “Shout louder if you want a change in presidents”]

THE JOY OF BOOHBAH

Just so you know, great minds on this side of the ocean have been thinking of ways to get the younger generation hoppin’. We don’t want our children and grandchildren to have high glycemic loads like ours (see post January 14). So here’s the newest thinking: if you can make iridescent blobs move wildly on the TV screen, you can make kids exercise their way into a Wesley Clark 5% body-fat frame. Here I am, struggling against all odds, going to the gym every day, and instead, I could have flicked on the set and booobah’d my way into a state where my cells would have been begging for more glycemic work. That’s the positive spin on the new PBS series. The less optimistic: it’s a bunch of iridescent blobs wiggling and looking like the work-out isn’t doing them a bit of good, for pete’s sake. And do you understand the noise accompaniment? Nasty. Enough to make you want to reach for the Skittles.

Future Generation of Lawyers

(just no lawyer jokes, please)

I finished grading the last law exam today (one day ahead of the deadline  ).
Most of the first year students in my Torts class did respectable work. Some were quite outstanding. In my Family Law class, on the other hand, I had a handful of the worst exams that I’d ever seen (in my uninterrupted 10 years, i.e. 20 semesters, of teaching this class). The question was extremely straightforward: a long fact pattern detailing the life of a woman who had one too many marriages (even by Bush's standards), a few too many affairs, and a bunch of marital and nonmarital children. The point was to secure a financially stable future for her and for her children, and to keep the children together.
Here are some literal quotes from exam-takers (fyi, Barbie is the client, Bill is her latest husband of 3 years; a few of the comments are from the same student; square brackets are my own notes):

- “Bill may claim rights to 14 year old (from a previous marriage) as well, even though not the biological father, depending on his relationship with the 14 year old” [a regular Michael Jackson kind of guy!]
- “Courts seem to prefer some sort of joint custody so she’ll have to put up with it”
- “Courts look at domicile and where they have been living because they are concerned with state interest”
- “In Wisconsin, one needs to show declaration of intent before someone to get married.”
- “She could argue that it is not in the best interest of the child for Mona to visit and the trial court could grant her this presumption, however court may override it if they determine their own best interest.”
- “By looking at the specifics of his infidelities and comparing them to effects that they had on Barbie it may be possible to show that, for example Bill had so many affairs that he was reckless and outrageous in regards to Barbie because he put her at a risk of catching an STD and as a result of said behavior Barbie suffered emotional distress” [wait, is this an errant exam from the Torts class?]
- “States want to respect the Full Faith and Credit clause because it promotes comity between the states and discourages forum shopping so that people try to get what they want.”
- [maybe you have to be a lawyer to appreciate the absurdity of this one:] “Under the Uniform Family Support Act, a state has no jurisdiction to modify child support orders issued by another state that has lost its continuing exclusive jurisdiction.” [so once a state loses jurisdiction, man, it’s gone!]
- “And Barbie is still young, 36. She’s got the world ahead of her. And I am still young so I’m sure I’ll have plenty of legal bills for Barbie in her future.”

Hey, this law stuff isn't that tough! Can't wait to hang that shingle!

THIS ONE'S FOR YOU!!!!

What do the following people have in common?

Janis Joplin
Paul Cezanne
Edgar Allan Poe
Dolly Parton
Michael Crawford
my daughter

yes, of course, great artists all, but also….

….happy birthday!